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Saturday, September 27, 2014

Late September


My mom found this website, Zulily, that sells sweater dresses! I've been blabbing on and on (more like posting) via Pinterest about sweater dresses, and now I finally see some! Not to mention that some of them are on sale! xD Now, I've just gotta find my size...because all the ones I wanted weren't in my size. Either too big or too small. Because, you know, that's just my life! xD lol

Season 2 of Agents of Shield was a decent, good start! But I just keep waiting for it to get better, you know? (if you've seen the show of course - if not, feel free to skip this section xD) I just...like my brother was saying, the series has a good starting point with the storyline and characters, but then I feel like it doesn't go anywhere. The characters don't feel fully fleshed out yet, even though it's been a season now...I mean, if I had gotten to know Fitz's character better, I would have felt even worse for what's happening to him. The same thing with May, who was just too cold in s1 to be likable enough. Coulsion is okay, but he got preachy about SHIELD and now looks to be going into the opposite direction - acting like them (I knew this was gonna happen). Simmons I like, but there wasn't much of her in this episode (there's kinda a spoiler that I won't post on here). Skye is okay (although I do like her new confidence/training on the field), I never got to really know Triplet so he's just there, and Ward...don't even get me started on Ward. He's just so, ugh. I don't think anyone would care if he left the show. He's pretty much been made irredeemable now, though I know they'll probably try to redeem him (but how?) And the storyline was eh, but it was good enough...I mean, it's not my favorite show that I have to watch every night, but it's a good show. I just feel like it had so much potential, but whatever. I guess that's why we're all different writers :D

Lab Rats is probably the best show on air right now (well, second best show that I'm watching - there's still Sherlock ;) It's just SO good! I mean they make fun of some predictable story lines by having characters not act like that or have the story go into a different direction...it's just an unpredictable show! I saw one of the more recent episodes the other day, and it was really good! I really like what they're doing with the show. I love Douglas and how they made him good now. Perry cracks me up. The actors are great. If I stop watching Switched At Birth next year (the shows come on the same night), I'm definitely going to tune in onto Lab Rats :D

In other news, I have rekindled my relationship with Animal Crossing. More than that, actually, I've become a little obsessed with it. You see, with AC it can be really fun and addicting at one moment, but eventually it becomes boring the next. But hey, that's all video games, eh? And I love how realistic AC is. My favorite is still the GameCube version (so glad I still have the backwards-compatible Wii :D), but New Leaf looks pretty good, and I've heard good reviews for it (it was rated even HIGHER than GC, I think!) Wild World is pretty good, too, even though it's not on AC: GC's level. I didn't care for City Folk too much...there wasn't as much to do, and they got rid of being able to talk to neighbors and possibly ask for requests. But I did like some of their upgrades... I know that this is a LOT to ask for, and I don't expect it to happen, but I would just love an AC game that combined the highlights of all the AC games! xD But if not that, just have the original AC game with being able to save anywhere you want to from WW (that was such a life-saver!)

So I finished Need this week! It was pretty good. It's an interesting story, Zara is a cool (and sarcastic/funny) character, but...the story lacks suspense. I think someone on Goodreads hit the nail on the head with that one. The pixies just weren't as threatening to me as I had hoped them to be. If a villain's not really fleshed out (morally ambitious/not purely evil) or a mastermind, I like the genuinely creepy and threatening type (of course there are other types, but that just seemed to be the vibe that I got from these pixies). That's how Vader and Voldemort are. The book itself went kinda fast, too...there weren't as many descriptions as I've read in other books, and, while I don' like overlong descriptions, I felt like more were needed. But it was a good book overall. I guess that I was just so blown away with City of Ashes that I was hoping to like Need just as much. But they're just different books, which is fine, of course. I now realize that romantic fantasy isn't a favorite genre of mine.

Speaking of City of Ashes, The Mortal Instruments is my new favorite book series :D I mean, of course Harry Potter is still my favorite book series, but MI is just really awesome! I love Cassandra Clare's writing style, the fantasy world she's created, the characters are pretty awesome, and it's just overall around awesome. It's almost like Harry Potter with a teenage female in the lead instead ;) I can't wait to read City of Glass - I read a sample of it but put it on hold at the library.

I was also thinking about reading The Darkest Power Series. I like the fantasy element in it, and the protagonist, Chloe, seemed pretty likable, from the sample I read of the book. So I might put The Summoning back on hold (I had taken it off because I thought I'd be getting it at the same time I'd get City of Ashes, but it hasn't come yet :/)

In the writing realm, I think I've solved my problem! Lately, I've been lacking motivation. But it's not just in writing, it's in everything in life :/ I've actually felt this way for a few years, but I thought it would just go away...I probably should tell someone, especially since it's a symptom of depression and I don't want to go through that again.

It just feels so hard to get motivated about things as much as I did before. It's like I have to force myself to get motivated, and I know that doesn't make any sense. I mean, I should just naturally be motivated by things. Sometimes I just feel like I could go on the screens all-day with nothing to do, but then I'll get bored with that and feel like I'm not doing anything in my life but I don't feel like I have the enthusiasm to start doing something productive.

And sometimes I don't feel this way, but the opposite: sometimes I feel like I have too many things to do, and I feel like I don't have enough time to do it all! Whenever I have those "I don't feel like doing anything" days (which are becoming too common), I always think, "Why don't I just think of all the things that I wanted to do but felt like I didn't have enough time to do before now?" (confusing sentence, sorry). But then I don't feel like doing that, either! I'm just out of it lately, and the more I believe I'm out of it, the more I will be. I just don't feel like I can get out, almost like, "What's the point?" I mean, I'm trying to, but it's hard...

Anyway, getting back to my writing...whenever I solve that problem in my life, I hope I can conquer it again. I've got pins full of writing prompts that should motivate me. Plus, I have some writing books and bought a new one, as well as a biography on J.K. Rowling, that should help be motivators for me.

That takes me to the booksale, ladies and gentlemen! We went there Friday, and let me tell you - I ONLY BOUGHT 3!!! That's right, 3! Remember last year when I said I had bought too many? And in the past years I had  bough WAY too many. But now I didn't It wasn't that there weren't a lot of books there - believe me, there were - but I realize that the all great and powerful library has many books I can rent from there that I don't actually want to shelf on my own bookshelf. Like my mom said, I'm more likely to reread nonfiction than fiction, so I only got a few fiction books. But they look good! Besides the one about writing and J.K. Rowling (THE BEST AUTHOR OF ALL TIME!!! XD), I got one about money.

The last book took me to an idea that came to me awhile ago - I realized that a lot of us are scared of money - why else don't we talk about it a lot or even teach it in school? But I'm trying not to be scared of it anymore. And I am interested in it - I mean, money is important xD But I want to do it in a way that doesn't make me scared of poverty or doing things the "right" way, if that makes any sense (I'm not sure that there is a "right" way to make money; if there was, everyone would be doing it xD), and this book isn't. The author is really good, so that's part of the reason for it. And I learned that nothing in life is impossible (unless the laws of physics tell us otherwise, of course xD) -it can be challenging (I don't want to say difficult), but not impossible. That includes everything in life, including money :)

I watched Under The Dome's season finale today! It was interesting, to say the least. In a good way, but...it does get weird at times. Like Lost. But it was very engaging. Jim's basically gone crazy (sorry if those names mean nothing to you :P), and the Dome does crazy stuff. So, yeah, just regular old stuff xD Ooh, and one of my friends from dance was an extra! I saw her :D

I'm sorry I got this post done so late! I honestly didn't feel like writing it today, copying everything down from my diary up here. But I did it, didn't I? Cause I'm awesome xD LOL! But seriously...I think I might write a little on my draft of following blog posts from my diaries everyday so it won't grow to be too much. I just get so lazy sometimes, y'all xD

Before I go, I want to throw out some random facts: Once Upon A Time returns for its fourth season tomorrow (YES!), I wrote a review for Agents of Shield's season 2 premiere on this blog (which I'll probably do for OUAT, too), and candy is awesome. Goodnight!!!

Saturday, September 20, 2014

I Don't Know What To Call This Blog Post

(I got this from a link via Pinterest)

Haha, is that funny? See what I did there? xD

It's been about a month since I've written inside my diary!!! Well, a little longer than that now, but still about a month. I can't believe that. I think I missed a few (maybe 2?) days of logs, but other than that, I've written in it everyday! Somedays have less entries than others, of course; others are overflowing on the pages! xD

Anyway, I'm really glad I started witting down in my diary. Writing is a way I express myself. And to write down in it everyday shows me who I was, what I was thinking, what I was feeling, and who I am now :D

Speaking of writing...I feel like I've burned out again! Didn't I post how my editing skills were par on last week??? Well, now I feel the opposite - I HAVE NO IDEAS!!!! AAH!!! I know it's normal to have writer's block every now and then, but now I feel like I keep going back and forth between having no writing ideas AT ALL, to being somewhere in the middle, to having TOO MANY IDEAS!!! Why can't I just be in the middle??? A lot of times I am, but lately I haven't been...that really has to change...

There's a contest going on at Movellas based on a book that someone got published in print after previously putting it up on Fictionpress!!! That just makes me excited because 1). the contest has an exciting prompt that helped kick my writing gears back into motion, and 2). the fact that someone got published from posting a story online gives me hope for the same thing! I'm already on Figment, Movellas, Wattpad, and Fictionpress, so that gives me 4 chances, right? And my Bookworm Love story was an editor's choice in the Figment contest I entered it in, and Alice's Wonderland actually WON a silver award on Movellas!!! So at least I have achievements :D Haha...

But I think, in all honestly, I want to get published. I realized that I don't have to start off big with novellas-in-progress (I have a gazillion of them in dire need of editing!!!) - I could publish my short stories first!!! They have flash fiction (really really short stories) in magazines sometimes (I read about it), so maybe I could do that! Flash fiction is easier to write than a novella or even a short story, so I could work on editing it MUCH quicker than a novel! Who knows? Let's see what the future has in store for me!!! :D

I wonder if, deep down, our subconscious knows more than we know. Or, maybe, we know more than we give ourselves credit for. I know, I know, completely random thought, but I couldn't help but think about it.

It still feels strange to say Robin Williams' name, especially in past tense :( I mean, I know it's been a month since he died, but it still feels odd. I can't even mention Aladdin anymore - I mean, it's not the same anymore. Does it make so much since for me to be like this? I didn't even know him.

I guess I just feel like I understood what he was going through - to an extent, of course. I doubt I was as depressed as he was, but depression is depression, and even the mildest forms can make you feel like your life is over. I know I did. But he's not in pain anymore, and that makes me happy. Rest in peace, Genie :')

THE NEW TRAILER FOR MOCKINGJAY CAME OUT MONDAY!!! It wasn't much, but who cares? I'm gonna see it anyway. This one looks darker than the past films, though. But it IS Mockingjay - the book wasn't exactly rainbows and ponies. But I HAVE to see it! I mean, not literally, but they've done SO well with Hunger Games and Catching Fire! I'm still amazed that I was enjoying the books pretty well, but the films? It's like I HAVE to watch them xD

I can't believe how far we've gotten in 2014! Well, I kinda can, especially since I say that EVERY year, but I'm just looking back on its reflection...The beginning of the year was kind of crappy for me, but I'm glad it changed around more than halfway through it :) And good things have happened, too. Like dancing at my new dance studio, meeting two actors from Under The Dome (I'll NEVER forget that day), Days of Future Past (the BEST X-Men film so far!)...overall, it has been a good year.

It would be fun to do a 2014 countdown, wouldn't it? Let's do it, people!


Best of 2014 (so far!)

Movies: Days of Future Past; The Lego Movie;  Guardians of The Galaxy; and The Winter Soldier

Television: Once Upon A Time; My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic; and Under The Dome (I don't watch a lot of TV, so sorry this list is so short :P)

Music: ARIANA GRANDE!!! (Just kidding, but she should win this year, IMO, for best music); Problem, Ariana Grande ft. Iggy Azalea; Fancy, Iggy, Azalea ft. Charli XCX; Boom Clap, Charli XCX (see what I did there? ;); Am I Wrong, Nico & Vinz; Rude, Magic (I'm currently in love with that song); Can't Remember To Forget You, Shakira ft. Rihanna; Beating Heart, Ellie Goulding; Maps, Maroon 5; Come Get It Bae, Pharrell Williams; Classic, MKTO; Chandelier, Sia (very dark but I admire Sia for speaking out about her struggles); and there are probably more.

Books: ??? (unfortunately, I haven't read many new ones - I go to the library since I'm broke xD)


And that's all I can think of! For now. But stay tuned for more in the very near future! xD

Being honest with myself is one of the best things that I've ever done. I know, another random thought, but my diary had random thoughts sporadically logged down. I can't remember what it's called, but it's something when you just write down whatever's on your mind without stopping to think about what you're writing, exactly. I think that's happened to me before, and it's also been the result of some great stories of mine ^_^

Have you ever felt crazy? I have. Lots of times. I'm sure everyone has at some point and time in their life. And I don't just mean like you're acting weird - I mean like I've lost my mind. I've felt like that a lot...Sometimes I wonder if I've ever been mentally ill or not and that just makes me feel...I have a mixed response. I would be relieved if I knew that the reason I went through some pretty horrible things was because there was something wrong with me, but I don't *actually* want something to be wrong with my brain, you know?

I should probably stop thinking about it and focus on what makes me happier and healthier. Sometimes, I feel like I don't want to. I think I must have been so used to feeling depressed that I don't know what happiness, very sincere happiness, is anymore - I mean, I do know what it is, but I haven't felt in as often as I used to, so I'm afraid of change. But I'm going to get over that. I read some quote that said something about how change doesn't hurt, but resistance to change does. So I've gotta change that (haha, change! Was it weird to have a funny moment then???...)

I did a LOT of work at the library Thursday for the booksale!!! The booksale isn't until next Friday, but, of course, someone's gotta load all of the stuff out! And there were a LOT of books that needed to be unloaded, and there are still a lot left, too! I had to open boxes and put books in boxes and seal the bottom of boxes, and at one point I accidentally cut myself with the box cutter (because I wasn't being careful)...after awhile I got mentally drained xD But they had some snacks there and some water to drink (THANK GOD FOR WATER!!!), and the ladies working with me were friendly. I love helping out with the community.

City of Ashes was REALLY good - like, almost better than City of Bones! I can't remember when I finished it, but it was sometime this week...anyway, like I said, it was really good. Jace is a frustrating  character for me, but not in a bad way - he's likable and annoying at the same time xD I kind of liked Maia, I don't know - she seemed cool, and I could totally see her with Simon ;) I wish Isabelle was in this book more, because I love her - she shows that female characters can be feminine AND strong! They don't all have to be tomboys to be "strong"! (I'm sorry, but "strong-willed females" and that equating to girliness=weak has been bugging me lately...) Anyway, Mortal Instruments is my new favorite book series to get obsessed with, since I finished Harry Potter (boo!!! Write more books, J.K. Rowling!), Divergent, Legend, and all of my other book series.

Now, I'm reading Need, a book I actually read a LONG time ago (I think last year???) but never finished. It's not that it's a bad book - it's pretty good, really - but sometimes I am getting bored with it. Not as much is happening with it as I'd like for it to. But I still enjoy it. I love the main character, Zara, because she's so sarcastic and acts like a regular teen would if she was in the midst of a weird supernatural world that she hadn't realized that she was apart of. A lot of times, the protagonists are the least interesting characters, but that's not the case with Zara. And I like her boyfriend, Nick. Overall, it's a pretty good book.

I can't really think of anything else, so I'll end the post with three random facts about me: I'm obsessed with Pinterest (as you already know), I love notebooks, and love is good. Peace!!! <3

Saturday, September 13, 2014

Pinterest, Purging, & Procrastination

Sometimes, I feel like I have so many hobbies that I don't know what to do with myself! Pinterest reintroduced me to my love for fashion (Pinterest is beaming WAY too addicting...not to mention a great place to procrastinate! I mean, there're so many GREAT things to find on there!) I can't say that it's my dream job, whatever that is, anyway (I still don't know), but I REALLY enjoy putting pieces of clothing together that complement each other. And I've discovered that I have an obsession with sweater dresses (they're GORGEOUS!). And sweaters. And scarfs. And boots. And winter clothing, really, which is the only thing I really like about winter :P

But seriously...I want to find a way to combine my hobbies together. I know that my fashion is basically incorporated into my upcycling/sewing/duct-tape (jewelry, at least). I think I could use photography for my covers for my stories; the same thing goes for my art, and acting could be used to act out my characters to help get inside their heads. And dance and music just go together like macaroni and cheese. I'm figuring it out ^_^

Speaking of addicting...I've been a little (more like a lot) obsessed with the Mario sports games. We recently bought them again (the old disks were scratched, of course :P) and, well...You see, I happen to get VERY serious about Mario sports, sorta like how people get about sports with, you know, REAL people (then again, I have a thing for obsessing with the fictional...)Like, in Mario Kart Wii (which is INCREDIBLY addicting!) I had to physically calm myself down before playing it after a long time of not having it. But it was even WORSE with Mario Superstar Baseball! I was physically shaking from excitement and had to calm myself down! I'm better now, but still...And my mom gets on me about it...lol...

I'm getting writer's block (again) on my Rising Heroism screenplay *sighs* So I went to edit some of my old works (like the ones I published on Figment - they need some serious editing! Lol). I'm gonna try to get all of my already-written stories up to at least 10 drafts - I think that's pretty far in editing. Of course, I may need more than that - An Unexpected Trip, a short story that I wrote back in 2011, has had 10 drafts so far. Although I still feel like I could edit it (but when will I look at it and say, "Everything's perfect"?), I think it's far enough in its edit that it doesn't need immediate editing at this moment.

I really wish I could focus on one story at once, but I keep getting writer's block or just get bored with the story :/ But that's okay! Part of being a writer is learning what you like, how to pass the deadline, etc. I'm still figuring that out, but each time I'm getting closer and closer to where I want to be :)

But I did find something rather quickly, something that I thought happened in the past - whenever I read a really good book, my writing and editing skills are SO much better! I was wondering why I had suddenly gotten such a wild hair and was like, "I can edit! All right, let's do this!" and look on Pinterest on other writing advice and am like, "Bring it all to me!" I just feel like I can do almost anything now with my editing. It may take a long time, but taking my time with my writing makes it so much better :)

And if you're wondering about what the book that is so good that I'm reading - it's City of Ashes :) The Mortal Instruments series is SO good! It's similar to other fantasies that I've read, but it's SO well-written. I'm amazed at Cassandra Clare's great writing style (and her editor!) I have tried copy down way too many paragraphs from her story to see how she described a person or emotion or explained a scene, because it's SO well done

Lately, I've been thinking about vocal ranges. I heard that a 4-octave rang is rare and VERY good, which is why I wasn't surprised to see that both Christina Aguilera and Ariana Grande had one ;) And I saw some others, too. A 3-octave range is pretty good, too, though. Like, I think that's what Beyonce and Bruno Mars have (and they're both VERY good singers, in my opinion). It's stupid how good Christina Aguilera sounds live - it puts you to shame xD And I found some people with 6 octave ranges, or higher than four! There are some really talented people out there - but the trick is also working on your talent :)

Under The Dome was pretty good (and surreal!) this week! I don't remember everything, but, according to my diary...Jim was annoying (no surprise there), and it looks like Junior and Pauline are finally done putting up with him...for now, at least. Those Rennie/Remmies (how do you spell their last name?) need some family consoling or something. Just, geez...Joe started becoming suspicious of Hunter (even though I really like him) because he was asking so many questions about the dome, and he and Norrie discovered that he was interacting with the people outside the dome since he's working with Barbie's dad! But Hunter reassured them that he was trying to tell them not to take the egg, I think, because he saw what it was doing. He also said that he hated working for the people he was working with (don't know who they are), and I think and really hope he's telling the truth, because Hunter seems really cool...And Lyle showed up in the water, and Jim decided to be nice and get him out...Later on, Melanie sorta came out of her comatose, but then the dome started shrinking and she said, "It's happening" or something like that.

I did a LOT of cleaning Wednesday! We usually have cleaning people coming over every month or so, I believe, but Momma wanted to see if we could do it ourselves and use the money we'd usually use to pay them to buy all the new games we're getting (Animal Crossing should be next on the list!!!) So we did some of upstairs and actually haven't gotten to the rest because it's been taking up so much time (we are a family of ten, after all), but I enjoyed purging. Hehe, I get that from my mom :)

A Facebook post reminded me of 9/11 Thursday...I really don't know what to say about that day. I'm upset at what happened, but I don't remember anything. It's not like things that happened in the news that I saw the day it happened or a few days afterwards. I feel more for when things happened like with the shooting of Travon, the shooting at Sandy Hook, the shooting in the theater in Colorado, the Nigerian girls being kidnapped, James Avery's death and Robin Williams' suicide, and I know something else has happened this year, but I haven't looked at it.

Actually, I don't watch the news anymore, because it leaves me so depressed. I know bad things are happening, but all the news does is tell you what happens but they don't offer a solution to the problem. I don't want to do that to myself. If there is a problem, I want to try to solve it - otherwise, what's the point of hearing about it? Just to be afraid? Believe me, I've been there, worrying about everything every minute, and I don't want to go back. Besides, there are good things in the world. Why doesn't the news focus on that?

Sorry for that depressing bit of the blog post, but it was just something I wanted to get off of my chest. I promise the rest of the post will be happier. That reminds me of a friend of mine posting something similar to that...She's going through something right now that's affecting one of her good friends, so I'm keeping her in my prayers. I love my friend to death and wish the best for her. She seems to be handling things pretty well, which has me relieved<3

My dad bought a BUNCH of DVDs yesterday! I was thinking about watching a movie every Friday night, anyway, so I guess this helped! He got Winter Soldier (which we saw in theaters), Amazing Spider-Man 2 (I'm the only one who saw it because it was illegally leaked on Youtube xD I think I mentioned that in a post some months ago....) Cars 2 (which I still haven't seen), and Toy Story 3 (which I think everyone but the adults saw). They watched WS, and I came down to watch it for a bit, but I also wanted to play Mario Superstar Baseball/Mario Kart Wii and read City of Bones so I didn't see all of it.

Oh, and everything was in 3D - rant coming up here. My dad said he wanted to see it in 3D, but I guess I just have a problem with 3D because the movie I saw in 3D was very disappointing (it was Sharkboy And Lavagirl). Yeah I know that was back in like, 2003 or so, but I really didn't like that movie, so it stuck in my head...But in all honesty, I'm personally not that impressed with 3D. It's kinda cool how it looks real, but it's, I don't know, hard to focus on my eyes? I got a bit of a headache when I saw Avengers in 3D back in 2012 (which could have been because I read an article on it, so...)I just prefer to watch the movie in its regular formatting. But 3D has its uses. I just am glad it's not being as overused as it was back in 2010 - they kept releasing all of these older movies in 3D then.

Well, that's pretty much it. All of my blogposts will probably be about Pinterest (procrastination center 101), writing, reading, a deep, psychological thought, something funny, this section where I end my blogpost...come to think of it, why do you guys come back every week to read it? My life pretty much stays the same. In fact, everyone's life pretty much does that. We humans are so boring xD Lol, bye!!!

Saturday, September 6, 2014

September Session

(Credit goes to original owner)

We got a new TV Saturday! It's HUGE!!! Seriously, I ought to take a picture of it! Imagine a movie theater screen, but smaller, obviously, but maybe like...1/3 of it's size? I really need to get a picture of it, though there may be a glare from the sun that gets in the way...Anyway, we put the Playstation there, and we're going to use it whenever we watch movies. My parents did it with X-Men: First Class - goes, I love that movie SO much! :D And they talked about getting Star Wars and rewatching it, and my Mom said that my smile couldn't have gotten any wider when she said that :) *blushes*

I finished Titanic that day, too! It was pretty good - I liked how it wasn't just about romance but also some historical fiction (some historical figures were in that movie, too!) - but gosh, it was so INTENSE!!! I knew the Titanic sinking would be intense, but...well, I always imagined for some reason that it'd just sink straight down, not flooding people with the leaking water and BREAKING IN HALF sending bodies flying to the water and making people commit suicide because there aren't enough lifeboats!!! :O As much as I enjoyed it, I don't think I ever want to see another disaster film again! Okay, that's an extreme, but still! The movie's almost ruined any boat experience I'll have again :/

I don't really remember what happened Sunday...at least, according to my diary xD I've started writing in it and then copying what I've written onto my blog, which, of course, takes a lot of work after a week's worth of logs! (Some are short while others are VERY long!) But there's something about writing down in pencil and paper (I may try pen later; it feels better on my hands) that's relaxing, or just enjoyable. Hey, that's something I logged about! Haha :)

Actually, I did have this one thought that I was debating whether or not to post on here, but what the heck, I'll do it anyway: why are we afraid of being vulnerable? I felt that way that day, and I realized that others did, too, but no one talks about it! I think that's the problem: we all struggle but no one talks about it, so we create this illusion in which we're the only ones struggling and no one else does. That leads us to keeping secrets and lying to people (saying "I'm okay" when you really feel like you're about to cry). I know this from experience, of course...It's something I'm still working on, but that realization has given me a lot to think about...I hope it will give you guys a lot to think about to. I'm always looking for ways to challenge my brain :)

Not much happened Labor Day; no one came over or anything. My sister Amber and some of my siblings and I did watch First Class (or I at least watched a part of it) on FX, and I caught parts of Avengers, another superhero movie that I love :) I don't know why I love it so much - I think it's because it's a superhero crossover on the big screen, and I just love seeing all of the superheroes in one place! I think that's the best part :)

Meemaw also came over that day! She was wearing the shirt I gave to her for her birthday :) And my parents had left but when they came back, they brought her a cookie cake! So we sang a (belated) happy birthday to her :) In the Lloyd house, we celebrate birthdays weeks or possibly even months (if it's a late gift) after the actual date, which I'm sure others do, too, but I just like saying that we Lloyds do that, cause we're a VERY special family, one way or another ;) lol

I also finished last week's (at the time) episode of Under The Dome, and, well, it was kinda weird. To be fair, the whole show has always been kinda weird and held a Lost-esque vibe, and the main reason we watched it was because my parents met two actors from the show. But it is pretty good. It's just...well, Barbie and Pauline and Lyle and that other guy who was working for Barbie's dad were escaping that weird place that took them out of the dome to the "real world" and three of them (not that other guy) had weird visions of the past.

Oh, and this week's episode (or last week's) - FYI, BEWARE OF SPOILERS ON MY BLOG AS I TEND NOT TO THINK ABOUT POSTING THEM UP HERE - Barbie is Melanie's half brother!!! I saw it coming whenever they started talking about how they remembered each other, but WOW! And technically Melanie should be MUCH older than Barbie, actually Pauline's age, but because she had to protect that freaky egg (WHY is she so obsessed with it anyway?) that got her killed and brought her back to life, she's not (yeah that's a weird sentence.)

Here ar some other things I learned from the show that day:


  • Joe and Norrie have become kinda useless. No offense to them, especially SINCE I MET THE ACTORS IN PERSON, but they don't really have a purpose now other than Joe getting wifi under the dome
  • The egg can scream (don't ask...)
  • Pauline continually has freaky visions that get people killed
  • Melaine has a weird obsession with the egg
  • Junior and Melanie kissing is not creepy because physically, she is his age, but I couldn't help but think of him kissing a girl who was his mother's age...I suppose stranger things have happened...
  • The dome likes sending replicas of real people (Angie this time) to people just to give them an ambiguous message
  • Junior's family is MESSED. UP. Seriously, you've got Big Jim, the power-hungry megalomaniac; Pauline, the woman who gets crazy visions and had one that led her to fake her death and lie to her husband and son; Uncle Sam, who KILLED his nephew's girlfriend and wants to kill his nephew's girlfriend's brother and girlfriend because he thought it would stop the dome from coming down, and Junior, who LOCKED his girlfriend in a cellar to supposedly protect her from the dome...
  • Big Jim is still a jerk. Seriously, I thought after the situation with Pauline he'd at least try to become a better person like he told Pauline that he was a supposedly "changed" man, but then he trapped his wife INSIDE of her house when the egg was screaming and was getting one of her freaky visions again. And then he held Joe at GUNPOINT when he forced him and Norrie to give the egg to Barbie's dad and the people outside of the dome and knocked the egg down - but guess what? Just like Norrie, Melanie, and I think Pauline worried, something bad happened - the egg caused this freaky thing that I can't remember to happen! Great job, Jim! *facepalm* I don't even care about him anymore :/

Haha, that was a fun list to do xD Anyway...

Manny, Imani and I played Shrek 2 on the Wii (it's backwards-compatible so that we can play old GameCube games). Talk about nostalgia! Not that you guys have played it because I'm sure some of you haven't (or maybe a lot of you), but I remember when that game was in stores! It was SO much fun and it still is! I could be blinded by nostalgia, but I don't care. I love that game and I love the memories it brings me :)

We started a new workout *cringes*. The exercises we were doing looked easier, but trust me, they weren't! And we did more reps of them! I'd like to know why pretty much EVERY workout sheet or ideas for workouts contain squats, pushups, and/or planks??? THEY. ARE. EVIL. (Lol, just kidding...they FEEL evil, but the only reason I'm doing them is to keep myself healthy.)

I might not do Lizard-Man this month...scratch that, I likely won't. I'm just getting so bored with his character - I think he feels too much like an archetype to me - so I'm doing Rising Heroism (another  superhero story) instead, because I prefer the characters. Actually, I was supposed to do a Star Wars fanfiction, but I chickened out xD I need to gain self-esteem with my writing in that and stop thinking that I'm going to "ruin" the story - I'm not! There's a quote about writing that goes "To write is to be vulnerable" (I can't remember who said it), and I'm going to keep reminding myself of that.

But I don't want to just stop Rising Heroism - now, I'm running out of ideas for the stories, but the characters - I'm just getting started, baby! I came up with a new arc for one of my protagonists that I hope will help flesh out her character and explain why she acts a certain way - I saw a great quote about developing characters and how you get to know them like how you get to know people: ask questions. The questions that help develop them, of course, shape them into who they are. And characters must react to certain situations. That's pretty much it, I believe, or could it be summed up into one rule? I know that there are no "rules" to creating characters, but I only want a few tips so that I don't have all of these to remember.

Creating characters is so difficult for me, as I sure it is for everyone, and I have a feeling that it's never something I'll just "figure out". I have gotten better, though, as every writer gets better with practice. You have to make them human. Humans have conflict and struggle and work their way to overcome the struggles. That's why we love stories so much, the ones that really strike us in the heart - we can relate.

What else happened? I didn't get much reading in this week - I haven't been to the library (though I hope to stop by it today) and I need something good to read. We have Eragon (Manny bought it), but I just can't get into it. It's meh. And I need money for my Star Wars EU books, which I hope to buy soon enough, so my next stop is the library! I think I'll probably read either The Summoning (first book in the Darkest Powers series) by Kelley Armstrong or Need by Carrie Jones (I liked the second one pretty well but I never finished it).

I might start making Friday movie night! Let's see...a few weeks ago (or a month), I watched "Mean Girls", which was REALLY good and I can't stop thinking about it - I was watching clips of it the other day on YouTube! (I think it's my new favorite movie :) haha. That Saturday, I think, I saw The Parent Trap, and I think that following Friday I watched Freaky Friday, which was also really good, and I may have taken a break. But another Friday I watched Titanic, which was pretty good but too dark for my taste, and yesterday I saw Teen Beach Movie, which was pretty good! I loved how it parodied musicals and random musical numbers and how it didn't take itself too seriously and admitted that it was cheesy. It was a cute, fun film :)

Well, I can't really think of what else happened. I didn't really log in my diary things that happened to me physically, but emotionally, I guess, but I'm not sure I'm ready to share everything on here yet. I'm sure I will eventually, or at least tell you about some of the things I thought. Have a good day, everyone! :)